


Let Me Find You

by sameloveh



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: AU, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-18
Updated: 2013-12-31
Packaged: 2017-12-27 00:08:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 12,788
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/971918
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sameloveh/pseuds/sameloveh
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Life is not fair, that's a fact. Or maybe we just need to see it from another angle, to perceive how beautiful life is.</p><p>Or how Louis met the nerdy kid from school.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The party

Life can be pretty damn unfair. Yup, that's a fact.  
If you ask me why, well let me tell you my story.

Maybe you will think "you looked for it" but to be complete honest, I didn't.  
I am one of those people that doesn't see, hear or talk bad about other people.  
Unless. Well unless it hits me on the face. And that's what happened.

It started 3 months ago, to be exact.  
You see, my name is Marcel Styles. I am the nerdy kid from school. The one that dresses  
like a grampa would. That one that has no friends.The one that..... well you get the idea.

It was weird when this girl, Eleanor, came to me. It's not that people don't aknowledge me in general. Some people do talk to me, to ask me questions about school work, to force me do their homework,to push my face against a wall, etc.

But Eleanor, well she is one of the most popular girl in school, every girl wants to be like her, and every guy wants to have her. And she wasn't dump to come to me and ask me to do her work. So I was utterly confused when she asked me to hangout with her after school.

Me being me, declined. Of course. I wasn't about to go somewhere with her without knowing her motives. But after 2 weeks of her insistence, I... accepted.

"Marcel. Hey Marcel!" I heard Eleanor yell at me from across the campus. I was trying to get to my 3rd period class without anyone noticing my existence. But of course Eleanor had to be the one to catch me.

"H-hi Eleanor" I stutter as she was getting closer to where I was.

It has been 3 weeks since we first hanged out, to be honest it wasn't horrendous to be with her a few hours a day, she was fun and intelligent. And she understood to most of the things I said.

But deep down me, I just couldn't trust her to a complete level.

"Hey Mars, do you wanna go to my house today? Few of my friends are going to be there. You know, a small party to celebrate that is Friday." She said with a smile on her face as she took her cellphone out to text someone, probably to let them know of the party.

"I-I don't think so Eleanor, I have hom-homework to do" I said grimacing at my stutter.

"Oh come on, Mars. You can always do it tomorrow." I keep shaking my head, looking down at my shoes.  
"Sorry, can't" I answered, noticing that many people where getting out of their classes to go to their next period. The one I was trying to get to, before Eleanor stopped me. Ugh, now was going to be more of a challenge to get there.  
"I ha-have to go" I said turning around to where my next class was. When I felt her small hand take hold of my elbow.  
"Wait, Marcel. Please don't let me down. I really want you to meet my friends. And there are 2 guys that are new to school, maybe you can get to know them. Please."

Her face was now flushed, making her cheeks look really pink. And there was a small frown between her eyebrows.  
I let out a big breath out of my mouth. Well she was begging me and maybe going out for a while won't hurt.  
"Okay, okay I will go" I said turning to look at her with a trembling smile.  
She was now beaming at me "Perfect" she said.Jumping and hugging me "Thank you, Marcel. You are the best!" I just stood there, frozen, not returning the hug.  
"Sorry, sorry!" she said letting go of me. Remembering that I wasn't that comfortable with human contact.  
"Okay, awesome! I will wait for you Mars. Love you" She said, turning around going to I presume is her next class. And me walking to the opposite direction.

Love you? Me? Ha! The thing with women now days, is that they say these type of words without having any meaning behind them. Me having read many Romantic Novels know that these words, need to have a deeper meaning to them, not just sweet words you say to a str- 

WAIT! I stopped dead in tracks. 

Holy macaroni! I was invited to a party! 

Oh my god, what am I going to wear?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So you know how "Harry was the reason Louis met Eleanor" well this story is the exact opposite, or something along the way. Hope you enjoy it :)


	2. Him

The party was a disaster.  
Disaster, yeah that's a perfect word to describe it.

There are many many reasons for this, you see.  
Firstly, when I got there, there were at least ten people at the place already.  
Secondly, the party turned out to be a pool party. A freaking POOL PARTY!  
Thirdly, since I didn't know it was a pool party I never thought of bringing swimsuits.  
Oh and did I mentioned that I didn't know how to swim!  
Yeah, Marcel Styles didn't know how to swim, laugh all you want. But I was kinda afraid of pools. Well, not pools per se, but of drowning.

So I sat by myself on a table full of junk food, drinking water while everyone else was at the pool having fun and getting drunk.

Well, at least I convince Eleanor not to forced me to get in the pool by telling her that I couldn't use anyone else swimsuits (germs and all that). So, now she was with her friends, totally ignoring me.  
I couldn't blame her really, I mean, she was nice enough to invite me to her party. And its not like I am a good company, when all I do is stutter and talk nonsense. Maybe if I stand up really quietly and make my was to the back door I could just leave witho-

I jumped,startled, when I felt someone poke my shoulder,noticing that I have been staring at my cup of water for a long time. I probably look really dump right now.

I looked up to the person who almost gave me a heart attack, to discover that it was a guy who just minutes ago hadn't been there, at the party, at all. Never ever.

"Oh" Its pretty embarrassing that oh was the first thing I said when I saw him. My eyes going round as I stared at him. He was handsome, really handsome. I think, I have only seen people look like that in magazines. He had really beautiful skin, his eyes had the most stunning shade of blue I had ever seen, and his smile was just enthralling. A smile that was currently being directed to me.

"Hey, sorry to scare you but we almost lost you for a minute" He said, jokingly, giving me a big smile. I looked down to the cup of water that I was holding with both hand, blushing furiously.  
"Sorry" I whispered, I felt his hand on my shoulder, the one he had poked earlier.  
"Hey hey, I am joking." He said reassuringly   
"My name is Louis, and you are?" he asked, giving me a long look, with a small smirk on his lips.  
"I-I am Mar-"   
"Hey, Louis! You made it, I thought you weren't coming after all" I heard Eleanor yell while she approached us, interrupting me as I was trying to answer. She has obviously just gotten out of the pool, dripping wet, wearing a two piece bikini that leaves little to imagination.  
"Of course I wasn't about to miss the party you so nicely organized so I could meet your friends" he answered turning to look at me, with one of those long mysterious looks.

"Oh, so you have meet Marcel" she said, noticing he was looking at me.  
"Not really, he was about to introduce himself when you disrupted us" he said with a small frown on his face, making Eleanor's eyes pop open.  
"Marcel, this is Louis. Louis this is Marcel" She said quickly, pointing at him and them at me.   
"Remember I told you about two new guys from school, well Louis is one of them" she said to me,at least that's what I think because she was looking at Louis the whole time.  
Who could blame her, really, I couldn't stop looking at Louis, either.  
"Talking about other, where is-" she continued but before she could finish her question Louis answered simply "He couldn't make it"  
"Ah, well you are here now!" she said clapping her hands together, making a few droplets of water of her arms jumps from her skin.  
"You should get change, there is the bathroom over there. Hurry up, or you are going to miss the fun" she said, smiling with bright eyes, while pointing to where the bathroom was. Then walking back to the pool.

"Aren't you going to get changed, Marcel?" I heard Louis ask.   
I turned to look at him, shaking my head slowly "I for-forgot my swim-suit" I was probably blushing at this point.  
"I got an extra pair, I can lend them to you" he said brightly, like he just resolved a world wide problem.  
"I-I sorry, n-no, cant" I said said, shaking my head again and blushing to the tips of my ears. Goddess why couldn't I say a sentence without getting stuck for once in my life.

I saw him let out a long breath and sat with a thud on the chair besides me.  
"Y-you should go" I said to him, pushing my glasses from the edge of my nose "you don't ha-ve to stay her-here, I mean, if you do-don't want to"  
He let out another dramatic breath from his mouth, turning to look at me with sad eyes.  
"I really want to get in, I love swimming, I truly do. But I wont go if you don't go" he said simply, making my eyes pop open.

Was he really doing this? Really? I just met him!  
"I have an idea" he said, jumping from his seat "Lets get in with our clothes on"  
He was insane, yeah that's my conclusion! INSANE  
"No, no you are cra-crazy" I said shaking my head in disbelief.  
"Come on" he said, taking hold of my wrist and tugging at it so I would stand up.  
Oh, his hand was really warm, and it was small almost like a girls hand but stronger.  
I end up standing up from all the tugging, while he pulled me near the pool. Finally letting go of my wrist so he could take off his shoes.  
"Take them off" he said, pointing to my own shoes.  
I shook my head, crossing my arms across my chest.  
"No, I-I cant Louis" I plead,we were so near the pool, what if I fell and drowned. No, no, no no!  
I was scared, really scared. Probably, everyone else was looking at me now, laughing.  
But I didn't care, my eyes were trained on the edge of the pool. It looked really deep.

I felt the same warm hand take hold of mine.  
"Hey" I heard him whisper to me "Its okay, I am here" I turned from the pool to look at him, he probably could see my fear in my eyes from the concerned looked he had.  
"I cant swim" I told him, with big scared eyes.  
He gave a reassuring squeeze to my hand  
"But I am with you,and I promise I won't let anything bad happen to you" he said matter of factly, with a small sweet smile plastered on his lips.  
"Take them off" he said again, pointing to my shoes. And I did, with trembling hands and some difficulty but I was barefoot at last.  
"Come on" he said, while taking hold of my hand again, and pulling me where the stairs of the pool where.   
Descending stair by stair, while I squeezed his hand harder and harder until I felt the floor of the pool with my feet. It really wasn't that deep in this part of the pool, the water barely reached my chest.  
"See, its not that bad" he said giving one last squeeze to my hand before letting go.  
I let out a breath and turned to look at him, his eyes look beautiful with the light of the pool reflecting on them,it made my breath away.   
"Thank you" I whispered, with a small smile on my face.He really was a perfect being.

The moment was broken when I heard Eleanor say "Oh, you did got in Marcel"  
I looked down to the water with a frown on my face "Yeah" I said softly.  
I didn't know why but something in her voice make it seem like she was making fun of me.  
"Why are you both wearing clothes?" she asked but before any of us could answer she said "Whatever"  
"Louis" she said, turning her back to me to look just at Louis "come on I want you to meet Ashley, she is the one I told you about. She doesn't go to our school but I've known her since I was small"  
She took hold of his hand and start pulling him to the deeper side of the pool, but he turned to look at me. Almost as if asking for permission. 

"Go,I will just stay here" I told him, with a small smile. The truth, I didn't want to be alone, but I just couldn't make him stay by my side the whole night. He wanted to have fun, and I was the least likely to give him that.  
"Okay" he said, nodding his head and turning to look at Eleanor who was looking at us with narrowed eyes.  
"Come on, El" he said with a big smile, letting go of her hand and started swimming to the deeper side of the pool, where everyone else was.

So I was left alone, with my thoughts.  
More specifically, Louis.

From what Eleanor told me, he was new to school.  
But I had never seen him around the campus before, have I?   
Nope, I am pretty sure I would have notice some as handsome as him.  
And nice, lets not forget nice.   
No one, in my entire life had been that sweet, nice, and amazing with me, without even knowing me.  
Maybe, maybe we could be friends and perhaps more?  
No, no don't go that far, Marcel!   
But I couldn't deny to myself that I liked Louis,a lot.

I was so lost in my thoughts, that I didn't notice when Eleanor went to stand by my side, so I go startled when she said "He is nice, huh?" while pointing at Louis with her eyes.  
Oh, she probably saw I was staring at Louis this whole time.  
I just nodded, because really what else could I say.  
"And he is really handsome, as well" Oh yeah, I couldn't deny that, not that.  
"I like him" and I almost broke my neck at how fast I turned my head to look at her.  
Who said that?   
"W-what? I asked, oh the stutter again.

She turned to look at me, now. With a big smile on her face and with a light of something else on her eyes.  
"I like him" she repeated "And a little bird told me that he liked me back"  
Remember when I told you that every guy at school wants her, the proof!  
"Isn't perfect, Marcel? Us, together!"   
"Brilliant" I answered with a monotone voice.  
"I am just so happy!" she said, giving me a quick hug and letting go of me and swimming back to where Louis and everyone else was.

As she got there, she went to stand near Louis whispering something on his ear that made him smile and hug her tightly whispering something else on her ear. After that, he didnt let go of her, holding her by her waist with his arm.

And a sad smile formed on my lips.  
What was I doing here?  
Pretending to be friend with them.   
When the truth was that I didn't belong here.  
I wasn't popular, I wasn't good looking, I was not one of them!  
I shouldn't be here.  
I should leave.

And I got out of the pool, with my clothes dripping wet, picked up my shoes, and left.

How naive can you be, Marcel?

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry if there are any spelling errors, I usually write this at 4 in the morning when my mind is going crazy with ideas and I have to write them down before I forget them, just bear with me ;)


	3. Brother

After having walked home with my clothes drenched wet, and shaking from the cold. I ended up being yelled by my mother for not calling her to come pick me up.  
She gave me a lecture about responsibility and trust.  
Her face was red and her eyes were wild, both of her hands were formed into a fist and she kept walking back and ford in front of me.  
I could feel tears forming in my eyes, but I couldn't let her see me cry, looking down to my feet and nodding my head, taking everything she had to say to me.  
"I am sorry mum, I promise it won't happen again" and it really was not going to happen ever again, since I wasn't planning on going to any party, ever.  
I felt miserable, my mother had never been this mad at me. It just made me feel like I was letting her down, and it was an awful feeling.  
"Sorry" I whispered, again. Walking upstairs to my room and taking a shower and letting the warm water wash the pool remainders.   
After finishing up I put on my pajama bottoms and a long sleeve t-shirt.  
I went to my bed and got under the covers, feeling the warm soothe into me , and fell into a deep sleep. This has been a long day.

I felt myself wake up with a bright light coming from my curtains. Turning to my side to see the clock on top of the bedside table flash 6:00 in the morning that I could barely distinguish without my glasses.  
The weekend had been long and uneventful, I did received a messaged from Eleanor asking the  'why d'you leave without saying anything?' the next morning, which I ignored. I actually felt kinda bad from not answering but I had an excuse, I was grounded.   
Not really, but she didn't know that.

Getting to school and trying to avoid running into Eleanor was kinda tricky,  since she was usually the one to find me, but it seem that she was nowhere in the campus, or at least nowhere she usually is, which I am thankful for.   
But on my way of avoiding Eleanor, I found myself being pushed face first against a locker door, feeling my glasses slip from my nose as I tried to regain my posture but just being shove against the locker again.  
"Hey faggot, long time no see! teased one of the jocks that have been bullying for a long time.  
"Heard you went to a party last week, but you wouldn't get into the pool without your clothes on, huh, freak. That's so fucking pathetic, don't you get it, no one likes how you dress, no one likes you" he said laughing along with his friends.  
"Do you get it? Do you get that no one fucking likes you?" he asked shoving me again and making me fall on the floor.  
"Answer me" Zayn yelled, kicking me on the ribs.   
"Y-yes" I whimpered, feeling some tears fall from my eyes.  
"Yes, what?" he asked, kicking me again on my stomach, leaving me without air.  
"Y-es n-no one li-kes me" I sobbed. Feeling more tears fall from my eyes while curling into fetal position trying to avoid more kicks.  
"Fucking faggot"  Zayn hissed, kicking me one more time before walking away with his friends,  that I could hear were still laughing.  
I stay on the floor a few more minutes, trying to stop the tears from falling from my eyes and regain my breath. I let out a whimper while standing up from the floor and picking up the books and my glasses that fell when I was first pushed against the locker.  
I let out a breath holding my side with my arm and walking to the closest restroom.   
Checking myself on the mirror, I realized that I didn't looked that bad, my left cheek was pretty red and was hair was a mess but besides that and the awful pain on my ribs, I looked okay.

Zayn had been bullying me since he first laid his eyes on me, calling me names and hitting me when he felt like amusing himself and his friends.  
I have become accustomed to this treat not just from him but his friends that were always near him.When he hits me, it hurts physically,  but his words hurt deeper than any kick, punch, or shove he could ever give me.  He was the first one to start all this name calling,  hit Marcel thing and since then everyone else at school treated me that way.

"Are you okay?" I heard a soft voice ask behind me.  
I looked at the reflection of the mirror to find the owner of the voice. A tall, lean guy with light brown hair and a concern look on his face was standing behind me.  
"I-I will be" I told him, with a shaky voice.  
I saw him frown at my reflection on the mirror, making his brown eyes look hard and darker.  
"Did someone do this to you?" he asked, his voice sounding low and dangerous.

I stayed quiet for a moment, deciding if I should tell him or not. I didn't even know him, and he didn't look familiar to me but his eyes had looked warm and concern when I first saw him.  
"N-No, I-I had an accident, I fell" I told him softly,  it wasn't worth it he probably was going to laugh at me or taunt me if he finds out.  
"Don't lie" he said roughly, walking forward and taking hold of my arm making me turn around to face him. "Tell who did this, you shouldn't let anyone do this to you, Marcel!" he said, sounding mad at me.  
My eyes popped open, realizing he just said my name, someone I had never seen in my life before. I tried to free myself from his hold of my arm by walking backwards to no avail.  
Was he going to hit me? Was he going to hit me because I didn't said who did this to me?  
I scrunched my eyes closed,  moving my head to the side,  while he was still holding my arm with one hand, expecting the blow to come.  
But it never did, instead I felt strong take hold of me with a hug.  
"I am sorry, I am sorry" he said softly to my ear "I didn't mean to scared you" letting go of me to start pacing back and forth.   
"It just makes me really mad that you are letting someone do this to you, and you aren't even asking for help. Don't you want someone to help you? Don't you want to help yourself?" he didn't wait for me to answer "Goddess, is this person threatening you not to tell anyone?" he asked quickly, stopping in front of me, looking at me with big sad eyes. "Please Marcel tell me, I promise I will do everything in my power to help you"  
I was dumbfounded. I didn't know his name, I didn't know who he was, I had never seen him before but he was pleading me to let him help me. I was probably dreaming.  
"Who are you? How do you know me?" I asked instead.  
That made him smile a little, making his eyes look brighter.   
"I have seen you around school before,  and you have met my brother, half brother actually, Louis. That's how I know you and my name is Liam, pleasure!" he answered, a little too brightly.   
I felt my mouth fall open and my eyes go round. My mind going crazy.This was Louis brother. Louis brother was the one to find me in the school restroom after crying. Louis brother was the one pleading me to let him help me. Oh god, this was embarrassing.   
I felt myself blush and looked down to my shoes, making my glasses drop tp the edge of my nose.  
"Are you going to tell me who did this to you?" he asked again.   
I let out a sigh, composing myself and looking at his eyes, giving him a real smile.  
"It's okay" I told him "It doesn't matter anymore" and even though I had just got beaten and taunted I felt content, lighter, happier because Liam who was standing in front of me, looking at me with bright eyes and a small frown on his lips made me feel like there was someone there who actually cared about me, a friend.  
He let out a long breath, slumping his shoulders and looking defeated.   
"Okay, I will wait for you. When you are ready to tell me, to let me help you, I will be here"  
And I couldn't hold it anymore, I jumped up and hugged him, thanking him over and over again.  
He was laughing loudly, looking happy at my reaction.  
"But are you okay now?" he asked, after I let him go  
"Yes" I answered firmly. Because I was more than I okay, never mind the throbbing I had on my side.   
I looked around the restroom, picking my books where I had left them and turning to look at Liam.  
"I should probably go, its getting late and I need to get home" I told him, giving him one last smile before turning around and walking to the door.   
"Wait" he said loudly making me stop "Do you need a ride? My car is just outside, I can take you home so you don't have to walk"  
"No, no! It's okay, I like walking" I responded quickly, looking at him with a surprised face.  
"Nonsense" he said, walking to me and taking hold of my books, then walking out side of the restroom and to where the school entrance was.  
I couldn't do anything else but follow him, while trying to convince him to give my books back and telling him that I didn't need a ride. But he kept shaking his head, telling me that it was okay, that he wanted to give me a ride.  
When we got to the parking lot, there was only one car left and someone was already inside of it.  
Louis, was on the drivers sit, looking at his cellphone clicking some buttons so he didn't noticed  when Liam and I were approaching.   
And I stopped dead tracks,  I can't go in there where Louis was. He probably thought I was freak  from what he saw on Friday,  and from what Zayn told me, everyone knew already how pathetic I was.  
When Liam notice I wasn't following him anymore, he turned to look at me signaling with his free hand to hurry up.  
"I-I ca-n't go, I do-n't need a ride" I told him, nervously.   
He narrowed his eyes at me, looking suspicious.   
"It's back" he told me, and I frowned at his answer.  
"Your stutter is back" he said, making me blush to the tips of my ears.   
"I-I no I do-" he let out a sigh, walking back to me and taking hold of my wrist, pulling me to where the car and Louis were.  
"Come on, he won't mind giving you a ride" He said, whispering something under his breath that I couldn't distinguish but sounding like 'will like a lot'.  
When we got there he pulled the passengers door open, throwing his bag inside and I heard Louis asking him "What took you so long?" without taking his eyes away from his phone.  
But instead of answering Liam turned to look at me and telling me "Come on, get up" signaling to the back door that was still closed.  
At that, Louis looked up with a frown on his face intending to ask Liam who he was talking to but instead dropping his phone and sitting up straighter when he saw I was standing there.  
Then his face broke into a grin, looking at me with crinkling blue yes.  
"Marcel, hi!" and then turning to Liam and asking "What's going on in here?"  
"We are giving him ride home" he said matter of factly, getting inside and closing the door.  
And so I got inside the car with, closing the door and putting on my seat belt.   
Louis started driving after I stuttered my adress to him, avoiding looking at Liam who had a smirk on his face with knowing eyes.  
"So how did you meet?" I heard Louis ask, with soft background music from the radio playing.  
And I couldn't answer, because Liam had found me in a restroom crying my eyes out after getting beaten, and that is something I wish Louis never finds out.  
But thankfully,  Liam answered for me.  
"It was kinda funny, actually" he started "I was trying to get to the restroom after getting sprayed with orange juice on the face by Niall when he started laughing at something and I might add, something that was not funny at all. When I pushed the door open and kinda hit Marcel on the face with the door when he was trying leave, making him fall on his bum and dropping everything he was carrying" he concluded with a laugh.  
And maybe I just met the most amazing person in the world, who had just made all that up, so Louis wouldn't find out the truth.

"What?" I heard Louis yell "That's not funny at all, you could have hurt him!"he told Liam giving him stern look and then he turned to look at me quickly, and before going back to driving.  
"Are you okay, Marcel?" he asked me "Did this ass hurt you? Because if he did we can plan a revenge together to get him back" he said playfully.  
I laughed at that, loudly then blushed putting my hand over my mouth trying to stop my giggling.   
"No, no" I answered after I regained my breath "He apologize, and offered me a ride, he is really nice" I said with a smile on my face.  
"Of course I am nice, I don't want you to sue me" Liam said, turning his head and winking at me, making me giggle again.  
The rest of the ride was spend with Louis and Liam playing around calling each other names, making me laugh all the way home.  
"Thank you" I said to both of them, getting out of the car when we got to my house.  
I started walking to the door when I heard Louis call my name.  
"Marcel, wait. You forgot this" he said, standing a few steps away from me, holding my books that Liam had taken from me at school.  
"Oh, thank you!" I said with a small smile, walking to him and taking my books from his hands.  
Before I could turn around to get inside my house, he stopped me again.  
"Hey, um do you mind if  I text you some time. You know, to get to know each other more" he said, fidgeting with his fingers and looking a bit too nervous.   
"I-I yeah, of cou-rse" I answered, a bit too fast, taking my cellphone out from my back pocket of my pants, intending to give him my number.  
"I actually kinda have your number already" he said blushing beautifully. " I was just asking for permission" he said with a short laugh at the end.  
And looking at him, with the sun reflecting on his face, making his blue eyes brighter and softer, his cheekbones more prominent and his perfect smile directed to me made my heart beat faster and my breath go away.  
"I'd love to" I said softly, giving him a smile that probably shown my dimples.   
And he hugged me, hard and stayed like that for a little too long.  
After letting go of me, saying bye one last time he left.  
I stayed outside the door, looking to where the car had disappear not too long ago,and feeling a big smile form on my face.  
Maybe this day didn't start the way I wanted, but it surely ended perfectly, with a short text before getting to bed saying  'Sweet dreams xx from Louis'  
And probably the smile that I had after reading that text didn't disappear the whole night.

__________________________________________________________________

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoy! :)


	4. Reality

The next few days were spend with me looking at my cellphone day an night, nonstop. Waiting for a text from Louis, or the next text, since he actually was obsessed with messaging the whole day.  
Even when he was in class, which I find it to be quiet irresponsible, he'd send me silly texts like 'the boy in front of me keeps poking his nose, I think he lost something in there'.  
And I had to pretend to drop my pen every few minutes so I could hide under my desk and reply quickly, suppressing my giggles behind my hand.

But not everything was perfect, after the first time Louis text me, which was one amazing message and had yet to be deleted, I received the very next morning a text from Eleanor.  
The message had been simple and demanding 'Meet me at lunch, you know where'.  
By the time I got to the place she had assigned as our meeting place, I was scared.  
The message hadn't been nice or sweet more like a direct order I had to obey, which I did since I didn't want any of her popular friends to come and punch me.  
She likely already knew that I fancied Louis and he had given me a ride home yesterday, she probably was here to murder me where no one else could see or hear.

When she got there, she was looking at me with narrowed eyes, expecting me to acknowledge her first or something. I let out a sigh, ready to let all out and apologize but before I could let out a word her face broke into a big grin, showing her teeth and making her lips almost disappear.

"Marcel, you wont believe what happened yesterday!" she said excitedly, not waiting for my response. "When I got home I received a message from Louis asking me to go to a date with him!" she continued, almost jumping up and down in her place.  
And I stood there dumbfounded, feeling hot liquid travel from my chest to my neck and to my face. Making my heart drop and my eyes widen.I felt my jaw clench trying to prevent myself from screaming or crying, didn't know what yet.  
"Oh god, it was the most amazing first date ever.He bought me my favorite milkshake and we talked for hours about everything and when we got to my house we stayed outside talking for a few more hours. He is really sweet and he is so handsome! I really cant believe my luck" she finished, letting out a small breath and looking satisfied.

I stayed quiet for a few minutes, deciding what should I say to her. Should I congratulate her, tell her that they'd make a beautiful couple together? Or should I tell her that I liked Louis as well, and I intended to.. to do something about it?

"Wow, I-I am happy for you" I told her with a small smile, pushing my glasses from the edge of my nose. "For both of you, you will make a bea-beautiful couple." and I probably didn't look so enthusiastic about the idea, but I tried my best with the war that was starting inside myself, making my chest constrict and my stomach turn.

This was me, giving up the idea of Louis and me together,which was the most foolish, absurd and laughable idea I have ever had. Louis was handsome, sweet and popular. Even if he was practically new to school, almost everyone knew about him and his brother. Louis got accepted to the soccer team with little trouble after the reference he had from his previous school and Liam was nice, intelligent and good looking which was just what you needed to be liked by everyone else.  
And me, well lets not do this right now.

But maybe if I tried, I could still be his friend a real friend without ridiculous feelings on the way.

 

 

"Marcel" someone poked my arm, but I was so absorbed trying to finish the last chapter of the book I was currently reading that didn't notice it.  
"Marceeeel. Hey Marcel" still poking my arm.  
"MARCEL!" I jumped, making the book fall from my hand, moving my hand over my heart.  
"God, L-Louis you scared me" I said frowning at him, which made him pout.  
"I have been trying to get your attention, and you were ignoring me!" he finished, crossing his arms across his chest, making him look more like a little child having a fit.  
We were currently sitting on the grass of a small park that wasn't far away from school, it was really greenish and had lots of trees, and not many people went there.

It was a nice place to spend time in, relaxing.  
But who could relax when someone keep poking your arm nonstop.  
"Okay, okay I am listening. Are you finished?" I asked him.  
We have been doing this for a few days, after getting out of school he'd go to soccer practice and I'd come to this park, spending time until he was finished with practice. Then he'd come to the park and I'd help him with his math homework, which he supposedly was having trouble with.  
"Mmmh" he replied crossing his arms behind his head and lying down on the grass,closing his eyes and sighing.   
"Are you tired?" I asked feeling concern "today's not much work, I can do it for you. I know you've been wor-"  
"What? No!" Louis interrupted me, scrambling to put himself in a sitting position "Course not. Its just this week has been really long, the first match I am going to play in is in a few days and I have been stressing myself out" he said, looking at me with a tired smile.  
His hair was a bit wet from the shower I suppose he took after practice, and his cheeks were still pink from the exertion. He look really beautiful right this moment.  
"Are you sure, it really is no trouble" I said but he was shaking his head.  
"Nope, come on Marcel! I wont learn anything if you do it for me" he said, looking at me with bright eyes.  
"Okay" I breathed out. Those eyes are going to be the death of me.

After the talk I had with Eleanor, I tried avoiding Louis for a few days trying to "organize" my mind and feelings but after the second day of answering his messages with 'yes' or 'no' he cornered me after school, asking me if I was alright, if he had done something wrong.  
Looking at him, with those sad eyes and looking distressed, I just couldn't continue ignoring him like I have been doing and I decided to dismiss any absurd trouble I had and start acting like a friend. And this is when he decided that he wasn't good in math and asked me to meet him everyday after school at the park so I could tutor him.

When we finished his work and mine, he offered to give me ride home, which after some argument I accepted.  
"Wait" Louis startled me, taking hold of my hand stopping me from changing the song that was currently playing on the radio.  
"I like that song" he said turning to look at me with a big smile "who is he?" he asked me.  
"This is actually one of my favorite singers, he is quiet new but he's brilliant" I told him, trying to suppress the grin that was forming on my face.  
It was kinda difficult to talk about things that I liked, I didn't want Louis to think less of me because I liked things he didn't. It meant a lot that he was asking me this, it made me happier.  
"Wow, he is really good! Maybe you can show me more of his songs sometime" he was still holding the top of my hand, and was looking at me with a bright smile.  
"Sure" I said, biting my lip after. It should be illegal to have that much power in a simple smile. And those eyes, that were a bit covered with his fringe, twinkling.  
Wait. Wasn't he supposed to be driving! I turned to look at the window to see that we were already outside my house.  
I heard he let out a sigh letting go of my hand, and turned to look at him. He didn't look happy, probably wanted me to leave already.  
"Thank you, Louis" I said to him, picking up my books, opening the car's door.  
I stumbled when I first tried getting out of the car, getting my feet tangled with the seat belt that I had just taken off. I hear him laugh a little at me making me blush.  
"No Marcel, thank you! I truly appreciate your company" I heard him said from inside the car. I turn to look at him giving him a small smile and waving one last time before walking inside my house.  
Damn, I really liked embarrassing myself.

 

 

"But really, I have been trying so hard to concentrate but I keep failing!" Liam said exasperatedly.  
We were walking along side to where the cafeteria was, and Liam was complaining about his English class that he was having trouble with.  
"Maybe I should ask for a change" he said dejectedly, looking sadly to the ground.  
I gave him a little shove, making him look up at me, and giving him a smile.  
"I really don't think asking for a change of class is going to solve this problem, Liam" I told him, giving him a knowing look. He had told me, few weeks earlier, that there was someone who he liked in his class, but never actually told me who.  
"I know, I know!" he said, shoving his hands into his pants pockets. "But I really can't fail, and nothing else has worked so far" he said, looking like might start crying any second.  
"Maybe if you asked "the cause of your failing" out, you could start concentrating in your class instead of this person!" I said to him happily. Seriously, I was awesome at solving this types of problems.  
And he stopped, dead in tracks, to look at me with narrowed eyes.  
"Really Marcel, you are the one to tell me this!" and he might have figured out that I had feelings for his bother the same day he told me he liked someone.  
"T-Tha's dif-fferent!" I retorted. Damn! And he knew that I tended to stutter when I was nervous.  
He send me a smirk and continue walking.  
"Anyway, are you going to Louis match today?" he asked, giving me a small smile.  
I felt something break inside me. The soccer match that everyone has been talking about for a week, the first game Louis was going to play in was today, and Louis hadn't told me anything about it.  
"H-he didn't say anything" I whispered, looking at the ground. He had told me that it was in a few days, but never said the exact day or even asked me to go.  
"Weird, he told me he had an extra ticket to the match. I assumed he was going to give it to you" he said frowning. And really, some people were made to say the worst things at the worst time possible.  
"Maybe he forgot" he continued, brightening a little and taking something out of his pockets.  
"Here" he said, trusting me a small orange piece of paper with the numbers '1607' on the front.  
"Niall's got himself on detention, so you can have his ticket." he finished, giving me one last smile and entering the cafeteria.  
I keep looking at the piece of paper on my hand, deciding what to do with it.   
Maybe it was true that he had forgotten, he had been working so hard at practice that every time we went to the park he laid down on the grass and closed his eyes breathing in and out, he'd stay like that for a long time. And I stayed quiet during that time, letting him rest.  
But when he opened his eyes, he'd look excited and happier telling me everything he did during practice. And I'd listen to him, quietly and smiling, focusing on his voice which sounded marvelous when he talked about things he loved.  
"Are you coming?" I looked up at Liam who was standing behind the cafeteria's door with his head popped out looking at me with expectant eyes.  
I let out a sigh and nodded.  
"Yeah, yeah I am." and I was answering more than one question.

Later that day I found out that the extra ticked Louis had bought ended up in Eleanor's hands.  
And I might have tried to avoid going to the game after that, but Liam was waiting for me outside my last class. Startling me by taking hold of my arm and pulling me to where the soccer field was.  
"Where do you think you are going?" he asked, smirking at me. He knew me too well.  
When we got there, the visiting team was already there warming up but the school team was nowhere in sight.  
"He is probably in the changing room" Liam said, noticing me looking for Louis, making me blush.  
He just shook his head at me as if telling me 'do not deny it'.  
"Do you want something to drink?" standing up from where we were sitting.  
"Water, please" I said, taking out my wallet from my back pocket just to find Liam a few meters away laughing at me.  
I notice that the place was getting filled quickly, people around me talking excitedly guessing who was going to win the game and also about the new player of the team, Louis.  
Some girl sitting in front of me was saying how good at practice Louis was. And that had me thinking that I had actually never seen him play, since I was always at the park waiting for him to be done with practice. That made me more excited as the time passes, waiting for the team to come out and see him.  
The game was confusing to be honest. Most of the time I didn't know who was winning but looking at Louis running across the field and looking really determined made me truly excited. I spend the whole game jumping up and down on my place and screaming every time Louis had the football, which made Liam laugh.  
They won, they won the game, and Louis had been the one to make the winning goal!  
I think I might be deaf from all the yelling everyone was making, and I was one of them until I felt Liam pull my arm signaling me to follow him  
"Lets get out of here, I need to get home before everyone else does" he said, walking to the parking lot where his car was.  
"What do you mean?" I asked him, while following him.  
"There's going to be an after party at our house, didn't Louis tell you?" he ask, stopping in front of his car opening it.  
I shook my head, looking back to where everyone else was still screaming.  
"What about Louis?" I asked him, turning back to look at him getting inside to the drivers seat.  
"He is going with one of his team mates" he answered "Come on, get up" he said hurriedly.  
"I-I need to go to my house first, my mom doesn't kno-"   
"Okay, okay we will make a quick stop your house, but hurry up, Marcel!"   
So I got inside the car, still buzzing from the excitement of the game. I really had wanted to go and give a hug to Louis on the field, congratulate him for the game, but that probably will have to wait until he gets to his house.  
When we got to my house I heard Liam said "You've got 10 second and counting" while looking at his wrist watch.  
"Come on Liam, don't be like that" I said, giving him a pleading look.  
"9, 8, 7" he answered instead, so I got out of the car running to my house.  
It took me a few minutes to convince my mom to let me go, but after telling her that I wasn't going to be late and that I was going to take my cellphone and she could call me anytime, she accepted.  
Going to my room quickly and leaving my school books on my desk, I looked inside the drawer of my bedside table taking out a small box and running outside my house, looking at Liam who was looking desperate.  
"If they have destroyed my house already, I am going to shave all you hair off" he said to me matter of factly, turning on the engine and start driving.

When we got to his house, which I might add was quiet huge, many people were already there, actually a great deal of people were there.  
"Crap!" I heard Liam said, getting out of the car quickly.  
"Okay, okay here's the deal. Marcel, you go upstairs and lock all the doors except the bathroom. I will go check and see if nothing is broken or destroyed down here" he ordered me walking inside his house and leaving me to figure myself out.  
I started walking towards the door slowly, looking around, seeing people outside chatting excitedly and some dancing crazily to the music I had no idea where it came from.  
As I entered the house, I noticed a bunch of people, more than the ones outside doing the same and many of them giving me weird looks, making me blush and look down.  
I was here for Louis, not them, I didn't care if they didn't liked or wanted me here.  
Louis was my friend, and he- well his brother had invited me, so I was not leaving anytime soon.  
I walked upstairs, noticing that there were 6 doors, and walking to each one and locking them except the bathroom.I wanted so see around , find out which room was Louis, but I stopped myself doing just what I had been told.  
After remembering the small box that I was still holding in one hand, I decided to go downstairs looking for Louis.  
I was pretty sure that there were more people than before I went upstairs, it was more difficult to walk trough them.  
The first person I found between all the crowd was Liam, who was looking annoyed.  
"Hey, have you seen Louis?" I scream at him, trying to make my voice louder than the music.  
"He was in the kitchen few minutes ago" he replied as loudly as I had "Did you lock everything?"  
I nodded, walking towards where Liam had signaled the kitchen was.  
When I walked in the kitchen, I notice that Louis was with 3 more of his team mates, talking excitedly about something, and were still wearing the soccer uniform.Louis was giving his back to me, so he didnt see when I entered the kitchen, I walked towards the group intending to surprise Louis when he turned and look at me with round eyes. I did surprised him!  
He walked towards me with quick steps, taking hold of my arm and pulling me to a corner of the kitchen.  
"Marcel, what are you doing here?" he asked me, looking around the kitchen and then resting his eyes on me.  
"I-I- Liam invited me, an-d I went to the game. I-it was ama-zing, I wanted to congratulate you, you pla-yed fantastic" I told him excitedly with a big grin on my face.  
But before he could answer me, someone interrupted us.  
"Hey freak! What the fuck are you doing here?" Ryan, one of Zayn's friends and Louis team mates yelled from across the kitchen, walking rapidly to where Louis and I stood.  
He turned to look at Louis "Why are you talking to this faggot?" Ryan asked him, giving me a quick smirk.  
At that, Louis eyes widened and looked at the floor blushing furiously.  
"I wasn't" I hear him answer softly  
I felt Ryan push me making me hit the wall with my back and sneer at me "Fucking scumbag, get out of here!"  
I turned to look at Louis, who was still looking at the floor and then at Ryan who was looking at me with disgust, and nodded.  
"Sorry" I whispered under my breath, making my way outside the kitchen  
Now I understood why Louis hadn't invited me to the game, or why he always made me wait in the park during his practice, and why he didn't tell me about this party. I was after all the freak, nerd, worthless and pathetic person no one wanted to be seen with. And Louis didn't thought any differently of me.  
The small box that I had been carrying in my hand containing a CD with my favorite songs I had made to Louis ended up in the big trash can outside his house.  
I really am the most stupid and pathetic person in the world.   
It hurts. And the worst part is, I'm getting used to it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter, hope you enjoy! Please let me know what you think C:


	5. Truth

I felt awful, I really did. Thinking that all this time I had spent with Louis was just… I don’t even know why he bothered to talk to me, when it was obvious that he didn’t even like me as a friend.

Jesus, I just felt so pathetic and really stupid. And I hated that hot tears were running down my face, knowing that this was something bound to happen to someone like me. I shouldn´t let it affect me so much, but goodness; I had thought that Louis was different from everyone else.

My house was dark when I got there after walking back from Louis house, thankfully my mom was in her room sleeping and I made my way to my room quietly, not wanting to make any sound alerting her that I was back.

When I got in my room, it was warm and a small light illuminating it from the lamp on my bedside table.  I made my way to the mirror on the closet’s door looking at myself. My face was pale, paler than the normal, my nose was a bit red, my eyes were blotchy and swollen, and my lips were red from biting on the so much and I could see the trail of tears still running down my cheeks.

“Stop crying!” I told my own reflection; using both of my hands to rub my face.

“Stop crying, Marcel!

“Stop being stupid, stop pretending someone cares, stop being so pathetic, just stop it!” I yelled at myself, seeing in the mirror how my eyes looked dull and life less.

“Worthless” I whispered to my reflection, looking at myself one last time before changing into my pajamas and getting into my bed.  I didn’t fell asleep until the first rays of sun could be seen through my window.

 

 

The next morning or was it afternoon, I woke up with my mother banging on my door, telling me it was time to wake up and that she needed me downstairs for god knows what.

“Good morning mum” I said to her after making my was downstairs and walking to the kitchen where I presumed she was making breakfast.

“Not morning, Marcel” was what she answered, giving me a long calculating look, before sipping on her cup of tea and saying lastly.

“You have a visitor, dear” I looked around, startled, to find that no one was in the kitchen with her or in the living room, and looked at her with a confused look.

“Oh, he didn´t want to come in even after I insisted, he is outside waiting for you” she said sending me a small smile.

I nodded to her, walking to the entrance door, I really didn´t want to dwell on who it might be, so when I opened the door I was startled to be greeted with Liam´s back.

“H-hi” I said to him, making him whirl around to face me. And before I had a chance to say something else he jumped, hugging me with a force I didn’t know he possessed.

“I am sorry Marcel, I am so sorry! He told me what happened and goodness I can´t believe he did that to you! He is so fucking stupid. Jesus, I can´t even think of him as my brother anymore!”  He finished, pacing back and forth in front of me.

“I-it’s alright, Liam” I said to him reassuringly, taking hold of his arm, making him stop his pace.

“Come on, let´s go inside” I said, pulling at his arm, making him follow me to my house and then to my room.

“How can you say ‘it´s alright´ after he did that to you?” Liam asked, looking at me with a frown.

“I was so fucking mad when he told me what happen, but here you are telling me everything is fine! I don’t understand you, Marcel!” he was almost yelling, and his face was red and angry.

I looked at my hands, feeling something turn inside me, making my stomach clench and my limbs go cold.

“Just look at me” I whispered to him, which made him look at me sharply.

“Look at who I am, how I dress, how I act, what I like. I am not normal, Liam. I am a freak, just like everyone says” he looked like he wanted to say something but I continue talking before he could stop me.

“I was happy, utterly happy when Louis started talking to me. You probably don’t understand how it feels to be no one for such a long time and then suddenly someone, a person who is nice and sweet starts talking to me, and not because he was using me, but because he wanted to be my friend. And I just felt like I could be myself, without having to worry about that person judging me for what I like or how I dress. But… but I understand what happened yesterday and is for the best, he needs friends that are like him, that like the same thing he does and that no one else will judge him if they spend time with him. I don’t want Louis to go through what I go on a daily basis, you saw it yourself how cruel some people are, they don’t care about the other person feelings, they just like to hurt in many ways that leave scars deep inside you. And I would hate myself so much if I was the reason for Louis to go through that” I said, looking at Liam the whole time, trying to make him understand.

“And I would understand if you did the same” I said to him lastly, letting out a weary sigh.

And maybe I wasn't doing this just for them but to protect my own feelings as well. I didnt want to hurt anymore, I wanted everything to go back as before, when I was no one.

Liam remained quiet for a long time, looking tense and about to bolt up and leave. His hands were fisted and he was looking at the floor intensely, but when he raised his head to look at me, his eyes were bright and fierce.

“How can you say that?” he asked me, with an angry tone.”How can you think so low of yourself?” He obviously wasn't expecting me to answer cause keep talking.”Don’t you see? It’s not what everyone thinks of you, it’s what you think of yourself! If you like reading instead of playing a sport, then that’s fantastic. If you like to stay home instead of going to a party, then that’s great.  If you like to wear a skirt instead of pants, then that’s fucking amazing! Be who you are and love every second of it.” He finished, standing in front of me, looking at me with something strong in his eyes.

I was crying and laughing at the end of his speech.

“Fuck everyone, Marcel” he said to me in a soft voice, looking at me in the eyes.

After a long pause I nodded, with a big smile on my face “Fuck everyone” I repeated.

“You are perfect, Marcel” he said to me, and I couldn't hold back anymore, I stood up and hugged him more fiercely that I have ever hugged anyone before.

“And you’re amazing Leyuum” I said with small laugh in the crock of his neck.

 

 

“How come you’re so good with… with words?” We where both sitting on the couch of my living room pretending to watch television, when I asked.

He shrugged “I have had previous experience”

That made me look at him with questioning eyes.

He shook his head, knowing where my though where heading “Old friend of mine went though the same thing” he said with a sad smile. “He is all better now.”

He let out a long sigh then stretched his back until it cracked and then looked at me again.

“So what are we going to do about that stupid brother of mine?” he asked me.

I just shrugged. How was I supposed to know? Louis didn't want to be seen with me, what is there to do?

“Stay away from him?” I asked, unsure.

“Mmmh that probably can be a payback for being an ass” he answered with a small smile playing on his lips

“What? No! No pay back! He doesn't want me to be seen near him, so I think the best solution is to stay away from him.” I told him, moving my hands around exaggeratedly.

And now, he was looking at me weirdly.

“I think you got it all wrong” he said after a few second had passed.

I shook my head and was about to reply when I heard my stomach grumble, which made me blush and remember I hadn't eaten anything since yesterday before the soccer match.

Liam was laughing when I heard him say “You hungry mate? I know a place where they have the most amazing hamburgers ever, let’s go”

I thought about it for a few seconds and didn't find anything wrong with the idea of going out, so I nodded.

“Kay” Liam said “but may I use he loo before we go?” he asked.

“Behind you, right door” I told him, while he was in there I went to my room to get my wallet and when I went back to the living room he was already waiting for me with a big smile on his face.

“Ready?” I nodded “Come on, then!”

 

 

“Oh my god, Liam! These are really good” I moaned while eating some of the fries on my plate.

He smiled at me while eating his own food “Told you so, would I ever lie to you?” he said laughing.

“You are just amazing Liam”

“I know, I know” he said smiling and after a few minutes of eating he looked at me again, with a serious look this time.

“Marcel, I just wanted to tell you that you totally misunderstood what Louis did yesterday. I know he is still an ass for what he did. But he didn't do it because he didn't want to be seen with you.”

And I all but stopped eating the delicious food in front of me. I really didn't want to talk about that right this moment.

“Liam I-I really don’t….”

“No, no, listen to me before anything, please! What I am about to tell you is a secret, Louis and I’s secret. A family secret! Get it?” He looked at me with a smile that didn't quite reach his eyes. He was trying to lighten the mood, but I knew these were serious matters.

“He was my brother before my friend. I was 10 when we first met; our parents organized a dinner to introduce each other to Louis and me. So it was quite the surprise for both of us when they told us they were engaged and getting married.”

“I pretended not to like him back then, and I didn't even had a reason I just had this feeling he wanted to take my dad away from me, so I ignored him whenever we were in the same room and in school I didn't even acknowledge his existence.”

“I was scared, but so was he” Liam said, looking down as his hands that were clasped together.

“While I was dealing with some jealous childish things, he was going through something worse… he was-he is the friend I told you about, he went through the same things you are going through. He was bullied."

"I didn't know at first, but when we started school everything fell into place. While in the house he was loud and hyperactive all the time in school he was the complete opposite, he was quite and reserved, he didn't talk to anyone not even me."

"One day, while in gym, class I found Louis cornered by 3 guys and he was bleeding, and I kinda lost and started yelling at everyone and I am pretty sure I hit 2 of the guys" Liam said, laughing at the end and looking proud of himself.

"I ended up being suspended for 3 days, but those guys were expelled after Louis confessed they had bullied him for some time."

"Marcel, you cant imagine how hard this was for Louis, but he knew- we all knew it was going to be like that. And he was still afraid even after those guys were expelled, thinking someone else was going to start beating him again. It took him years for him to gain his own confidence back, to not believe what people said of him, to be himself and be proud of it."

"It was difficult for all of us, his family, but in the end he was happy, he was himself all the time not just home but in school as well."

"And now, now I don't know if he is afraid again or-or being a complete ass" he said running his hand through his hair sounding frustrated, then he looked at me in the eyes looking dead serious. "But that does not excuse him at all, Marcel. He shouldn't have done that to you and I feel so fucking torn right now, not knowing what to do, what to think, what to te-"

"Hey, hey its alright Liam" I said, interrupting his rambling, taking hold of his hand that was still on the table and not pulling the end of his hair.

"I think I understand why he did it" I explained, giving him a small smile and squeezing his hand "Thank you for telling me this, thank you for trusting me with this Liam"

He let out a long sigh looking at me wearily "So will you talk to him?"

"I need time to think, but when I see him again I will try to"

"Well you have like 5 second to think because he is outside waiting for my sign to come in" he said to me, standing up and looking towards the window that was behind my back.

"W-what? What do you m-mean he is ou-tside? Did he tell you to come t-talk to me? D-did he planed this?" I stuttered out

" I called him when I went to use your bathroom at your house and I kinda told him to get his ass over here cause he needed to talk to you" he said not looking guilty at all, while doing some signs with his hands behind me.

And all of the sudden I  started feeling really nervous, I didn't know what Louis was going to say to me. What if he actually didn't like me and was going to tell me to stay away from me. Christ, I could feel my breathing coming out faster and my palms were sweating. Oh god, I wasn't ready to see Louis, I needed to get away from here.

"Hey" I feel Liam heavy hand on my shoulder "Its going to be okay, its just Louis"

Right like if that was going to make a difference.

"I hate you" I whispered to him, looking down my lap not wanting to see if Louis was there yet. 

"Marcel" I heard a soft voice call my name, making me look up.

I had to suck up my breath because there stood Louis,not looking good at all. He had dark circles under his eyes and they were a bit swollen, his hair was wild like he hadn't brushed it all at all and he was wearing a baggy (dirty?) clothes.

"A-are you okay?" I had to ask

He laughed a little at that, a laugh that didn't reach his eyes, taking the seat before me the one Liam had been sitting before (who had conveniently disappeared).

"I should be asking you that" he answered instead, looking at me with those tired blue eyes, which were still beautiful no matter what.

I shook my head "Louis, I rea-"

"No, no. Let me talk please." he interrupt me "I am so fucking sorry for what I did yesterday, I was such a stupid prat. I shouldn't have let that prick treat you like that, and I hate myself more than anything for letting it happen. But I really don't know why I let it happen" Louis sounded hurt, frustrated and angry and his eyes were shinning with unshed tears, it made my stomach drop and my heart accelerate.

I couldn't let him think that it was his fault and he shouldn't hate himself for something like that, for someone like me.

"Hey" I reached out for his hand intertwining our fingers together, feeling more confident than ever. "I don't blame you and you shouldn't blame yourself. I-I am used to those things and you-"

"But you shouldn't be used to those things!"

"But I am, Louis and you don't need to blame yourself because of it, alright? Its not your fault, you did what everyone else would have done a-and if something like that happens again you should act just the same, because that's how its supposed to be."

Because you shouldn't go through the same thing you did before. Because I don't want you to hurt for someone like me. Because you deserve better than this.Because you are a star and I am just a broken person, were all left unsaid.

"NO" I heard him say, sternly standing up from his seat and walking towards me then crouching in front of me.

"No, please don't say that"and now tears were running freely from his eyes "You need to stop thinking like that, Marcel. You are way better than that. You are intelligent, funny, sincere, nice"he said, placing one of his hands on my face and moving his thumb up and down my cheek making me blush and tremble.

"And you are so beau-"

"Louis!" someone, a girl, behind me yelled, making Louis frown and moving to look behind me.

"Oh my god, what are you guys doing here?" Eleanor asked with a smile on her face, who was now standing in front of our table just beside where Louis was now standing as well, looking down at his shoes.

I let out a sigh, this has been a long day. I stood up looking at Louis who was still looking at his shoes and then at Eleanor who was looking at me with an expectant look.

"I was just about to go home" I said, which made Louis look up at me with big round eyes. "You guys should probably order something, this place is really good" was all I said before I started walking towards the exit, giving my back to them. 

With this I was making Louis decision easier, pulling out of his life now rather than later. He needed to be with normal people like himself, and Eleanor was the perfect person for that. I just needed to stay away from now on, even from Liam, and let Louis continue his life without having the need to hide because he was afraid of someone judging him (when I was the only reason he was hiding). 

And I could feel tears running down my face now, and I hadn't even reached to entrance door. I hurt everywhere and I knew I didn't have anyone else to blame but myself. 

"NO" I felt someone pulled at my arm just before I reached the door.

"No Marcel, I am not letting you go again, because yes I am scared, but you make me strong and it took me just one day to realize this and you don't know how much it hurt to be away from you knowing you were hurting because of me."

"So no Marcel, you stay with me to show everyone here how much I need you, to show them how much you help me be stronger, and to show them..."

"To show them how much  I love you"

And with that  he took hold of my face with both of his cold hands and crushed his soft pink lips  to mine making me suck my breath but kissed him back anyway. And it felt like a eternity but was probably a few seconds when he pulled away and I knew in that moment that I was totally fucked (pardon my language).

Louis eyes were bright, he was blushing and he had a small smile on his lips. 

"Really?" I had to ask 

"Yes" he answered, reassuring me with a small kiss on my lips "and I am sorry it took me so long to tell you because I have been feeling like this for a long time, probably since I first saw you" he said laughing lightly, making his eyes crinkle.

"At the pool party?"I asked, smiling while he move his arms to circle my waist.

"Before that, at school when you were at the library reading a book and you were looking at it so intensely and with such beautiful eyes and I thought 'I want him to look at me  the same way' and that's when I asked Eleanor to make that pool party so she could introduce us."

I was dumbfounded when I heard that. He was the one who planned all that since the start?

"B-but I thought you  were with Eleanor"

"What? No! She was one of the first persons I met when I first got to school and she was with me when I first saw you, and she told me you were her friend so I asked her to help me" cough "get you" he finished blushing.

Looking behind Louis where Eleanor was still standing and was now looking at the floor I understood many things.

I looked back at Louis smiling "You are amazing" I told him, feeling myself blush to the tips of my ears but leaning to kiss his lips nonetheless until i had the need to breathe again.

"I-I love you too"

Now he had the brightest smile I have ever seen on him, tightening his arms around my waist and burying his face on my neck, he whispered "Thank you"

"Oh" jumping away from me "I got this" he said pulling something from his sweater pocket. 

The CD I had made him with all the song I like.

"Ed Sheeran is brilliant" he said, smiling brightly.

"Ed Sheeran is mine" I answered, laughing playfully trying to pull the CD away from his hands.

"You are mine" he retorted,pulling me to his chest and crushing our lips together, again.

And yeah, I couldn't say no to that. 

 

 

 

 

Fin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay! finally finished this :) 
> 
> Please let know know what you think and Kudos are appreciated <3


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